Having Children

[chris]

Sarah,
I missed your post about IVF. I would like to have a separate discussion on when life begins. However, recognizing that may be very heated I'm going to communicate with Samuel and Mark before starting a thread to determine the proper location as well as ensure we're on top of monitoring it well.

 

[ChrisM]

Thanks Chris for recognizing a difficult topic. I look forward to searching the Scriptures together on the issue of life.

 

[sharonr]

Yea, we are all adults here
ways to not have baby's is not to try,what wrong with pulling out. Hmmmmm..

 

[Kathryn]

by sharonr

"Yea, we are all adults here
ways to not have baby's is not to try,what wrong with pulling out. Hmmmmm.."

Actually, Sharon, Onan in Gensis was struck down by god for "pulling out" after consumating his marriage to his brother's widow.

And back to the origional question, having children is a sensitive topic and rather specific to every couple individually. Some couples want to have lots of children as soon as they marry. Others want to wait. Some don't want any. In my own opinion, polygamous families view children as God's blessing on their marriage; while others (monogamous) tend to view children as responsibilties.

 

[CecilW]

Onan in Gensis was struck down by god for "pulling out" after consumating his marriage to his brother's widow.

May I suggest, Kathryn, that the reason for Onan's condemnation was a wee bit more complicated than simply pulling out.

His REASON for doing so was to deny a child to his brother via his brother's wife, who he had taken as a wife for the specific purpose and RESPONSIBILITY of doing so. Thus, his intent was to perpetrate a fraud upon them both and get his jollies while doing so.

Very uncool. But quite a bit different than planning for your own children.

Having said that, I come down on the side of doing our bit, in the wife marrying, child spawning, and wealth generating arenas, and trusting the God who promised to provide. Things may be odd for me at the moment, but I have found Him faithful in the past and assume my current situation is but a school class.

 

[Kathryn]

Actually, these generalizations are not accurate often. I have one wife, 5 children and see children as a blessing from God. Most of my Christian friends are in the same boat, monogamous Christian familes with lots of kids. Each family will decide what to do, and will be accountable to God for whatever He has called them to do.

You're right, I suppose when I said "monogamous", I meant secular. I suppose I also should've expanded on what I meant by large or small families, as I don't really consider 5 children "a lot".

 

[Kathryn]

Onan in Gensis was struck down by god for "pulling out" after consumating his marriage to his brother's widow.

May I suggest, Kathryn, that the reason for Onan's condemnation was a wee bit more complicated than simply pulling out.

His REASON for doing so was to deny a child to his brother via his brother's wife, who he had taken as a wife for the specific purpose and RESPONSIBILITY of doing so. Thus, his intent was to perpetrate a fraud upon them both and get his jollies while doing so.

Very uncool. But quite a bit different than planning for your own children.

Having said that, I come down on the side of doing our bit, in the wife marrying, child spawning, and wealth generating arenas, and trusting the God who promised to provide. Things may be odd for me at the moment, but I have found Him faithful in the past and assume my current situation is but a school class.

Ok, going off the bunny trail here... But I'm going to side with Onan. If his new wife had conceived that night, there would have been doubt over the paternity. He wasn't saying "no children", he was saying "no children right now". I've never in my life heard of a man who wanted ambiguity in this matter. Nor have I ever heard of a man who was expected to be okay with claiming a child who may or may not have been his.

I understand where you're coming from. It was Onan's duty to leave the ultimate decision up to a higher power. I understand you're saying that his wife deserved a child and he was ultimately taking that away from her while satisfying himself. But still... I'm gonna have to side with Onan.

 

[Isabella]

I understand where you're coming from. It was Onan's duty to leave the ultimate decision up to a higher power. I understand you're saying that his wife deserved a child and he was ultimately taking that away from her while satisfying himself. But still... I'm gonna have to side with Onan.

That is not the point though, it wasn't about knowing or not knowing if the child was his, there was not supposed to be ambiguity, or leaving it to a higher power, the point was it was supposed to be legally his brothers child and therefore his brothers heir. Biologically of course the child would be his and he will also be raising the child, since he is married the child's mother. The move was a selfish one entirely in denying his brother the legacy of an heir a continuation of his name.

B

 

[FollowingHim]

Well explained Bels. Kathryn, the story of Onan has nothing to do with the acceptability of contraception today. It was entirely about legal / cultural obligations to family being avoided, and using his late brothers wife as a sex toy instead of doing his job: giving her children to inherit her late husband's property and care for her in her old age.