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Where to go...

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SavedByGrace559

New Member
My wife and I have been happily married for 17 years and for about 7 of those years my wife and I have discussed the possibility of seeking out a 2nd wife. We finally decided - well ok - I finally decided (she has been wanting a sister wife for several years) that I/we were ready for 2nd wife in our family. But, we are stuck at the next step which I'm sure many couples have struggled with before - where do we begin to look for a God fearing and loving second wife who is open to being married into our family? I've noticed a few suggestions here pointing people to craigslist, or other dating sites, but I was hoping there would be more and better options available (ie. local churches, get togethers, specific dating type sites all that support this). We are located in the Fresno, California area and we would appreciate any suggestions. Thank you!
 
Don't go to Craig's List! Don't do it! :lol: You may be tempted to look under "causal relationships" and get an eye full! It is fun to shop around but... I would try the churches and Barnes & Noble. Lonely women, who do not frequent bars much, love book stores! Trust me, I know this for a fact! :D
 
Savedbygrace,

One of the best suggestions we have here as the staff is for you to simply begin serving others in the body of Christ. That would, of course, not be limited to just females, but to any and all who the Lord brings your way in providence.

I personally suggest that you become an excellent evangelist. Use your home, time, talent, gifts, etc to reach out to the lost, the hurting, and those in need. As you go along building a life devoted to missions the Lord promises that you will receive all that you need (Matt. 6:33). If you will make the gospel first priority in your life then the Lord will make sure all you need is suppled for you in that mission.

Also, when possible, schedule time to attend some of the retreats hosted by Biblical Families. There you can meet others, get to know the staff, be known by the staff, and build connections and friendships.

Blessings to you,

Dr. Allen
 
Thank you Cat's_Curiosity and Dr K.R. Allen , those are really good suggestions. Dr K.R. Allen, you had mentioned going to one of the retreats hosted by Biblical Families, and I had noticed that there was talk in another thread about possibly having one in mid 2011 in Monterey, California. Is this something that has been decided on or is this still in discussion?
 
If you will email our Director, Nathan, he can give you more insight into that. He is normally the one who plans when and where these are held. You can reach him at nathan@biblicalfamilies.org

I'm sure there will be some West Coast retreats again. But specifics as to where he can be of more help in that area.

Dr. Allen
 
Dr. K.R. Allen said:
If you will email our Director, Nathan, he can give you more insight into that. He is normally the one who plans when and where these are held. You can reach him at nathan@biblicalfamilies.org

I'm sure there will be some West Coast retreats again. But specifics as to where he can be of more help in that area.

Dr. Allen
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Thank you,
I just emailed him.
 
Since it is Mrs. Savedbygrace that is most interested in a sisterwife, does she have friends that might be a perfect fit in your family? A dear loved friend that spends so much time at your house she might as well be part of the family?

Just a thought...

SweetLissa
 
Cat's_Curiosity said:
Don't go to Craig's List! Don't do it!
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I met my lovely wife through Craigslist. She turned out to be a poly supporter and all the trimmings.
 
sweetlissa said:
Since it is Mrs. Savedbygrace that is most interested in a sisterwife, does she have friends that might be a perfect fit in your family? A dear loved friend that spends so much time at your house she might as well be part of the family?

Just a thought...

SweetLissa
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That would be great if there were a close friend of my wife's that were a good match, but there is not :( - great suggestion though.
 
"What GOD joins together, let no man put asunder."

I belive that GOD will work this stuff out the same way He worked out bringing myself and T-C's Rebeka together. When I quit looking and left the matter up to the Lord, He was faithful to provide. And true to form, His provision was VASTLY SUPERIOR to any of the women I had previously actively pursued. I thought I knew what I wanted in a wife. God, however, knew what I needed.

I don't know how helpful this is, but I guess my point is that if it is God's will, it will be done -in His perfect timing.

T-C
 
Have your wife invite women to Bible study.

It is a win win, because whether or not they accept polygyny you will have shared the Word of God with them.

Just do it in public places so they do not try to put false accusations of ....
 
Yes Barnes and Noble is an excellent place.
I went there the other night to buy a book or two. I looked around , the number of single women sitting around reading, computering :lol: floored me. I saw a very nice woman sitting at one of the tables after sitting down across from her I ask a question regarding her computer, after a 20-30 minute gab session, I was ready to ask her out for a bite to eat when she started talking about her political views , that ended that. The point I am making is most of them are not the bar types and like to read, I think next time I'll clean up and shave never know what will happen then.
PS
Now that I am a widower I can't believe how bold I have become and how easy it is to meet women my age (67). I am glad I came out of my shell
 
When is it best to go to Barnes and Noble? A certain day of week and time or holiday, etc. ?

I mean there got to be better things to do then hang out at Barnes and Noble all day.

Also how do you justify hanging out regularly if you did not buy a book? Because if you buy books every time you go and you go everyday that could add up to a lot. Of course I do not have that kind of time on my hands, but I am just saying....
 
When I was 15 I used to go in there get a cup of coffee and me and my firends would sit and read all day and they never said any thing too us. Though we were reaading up on how to be like Al Cappone (After I found out what the Rico act was I wouldn't sudgest that). But yes you can sit in there with out buying a book.
Then again that was 17yrs ago. So you my want to check,lol.
DiscussingTheTopic said:
When is it best to go to Barnes and Noble? A certain day of week and time or holiday, etc. ?

I mean there got to be better things to do then hang out at Barnes and Noble all day.

Also how do you justify hanging out regularly if you did not buy a book? Because if you buy books every time you go and you go everyday that could add up to a lot. Of course I do not have that kind of time on my hands, but I am just saying....
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Forgive me because I am still stumped, because in the area in which I live I would have no idea where there would be people open to this type of marriage. Upstate NY is very limited about everything let alone a plural marriage... Should I move???

Jen
 
Taller on my knees said:
lights12 said:
... Should I move???
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:lol:
Missouri, Texas and Florida seem to have the highest percentage of BF members ....go where it's humid! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Oh not what I wanted to hear....I am not a humid weather person...but thanks for the advise...I am a north easterner, so those states have air conditioning right??? lol I have been thinking of moving west... in fact I know that's where I need to go. I can see it in my mind and heart, in fact.
 
Take your time, Jen. No need to rush.

There will be a get together more or less over NY's. Write to staff@biblicalfamilies.org and ask about it. Prolly be young people there as well, if your kids wanna come. Meet some folks.

Check out the Resources / Introductions page, and consider asking for one. It's an excellent and effective service.

But there's no need to rush. Better to build a good relationship and then consider moving. Plus, from upstate NY, most anywhere in the US IS west! *grin* And we ARE all over. For example, there's a surprising number of relatively silent members in the Pacific NW. They don't carry on on-line as much as some of us loud-mouths (that would implicate me *grin*), but they're there.

Read folks' posts. See if there's anyone you'd like to get to know better, guys or gals. Lotsa ways to get acquainted. Have fun. And make LOTS of friends!
 
I guess it was not this thread, but I read on one where someone suggested Plenty of Fish dating site. I joined tonight and Oh My Goodness. I am not sure how long I will stay there, but it has definitely been an eye-opening experience. I most certainly specified a Christian Male. :shock:
 
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