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Threesomes, foursomes and moresomes

paterfamilias

paterfamilias

Seasoned Member
Real Person
Male
First of all, you should be ashamed of your mind going in the gutter.

Now that I have the obligatory japes and hijinks out of the way, time for the serious topic.

As a guy with his mind focused on the practical aspects of plural marriage and the day to day life for polygamists, I am curious about the site's opinion about not hiding the family dynamic in public.
What I mean by this is a scenario where the family...minimum two wives obviously and let's say 2+ kids...is out in public and walking together. Let's say it is an event for the kids, say going to a family farm where they run a pumpkin patch with corn maze and animals to feed etc. Are you as a family holding off on the body language that says we are all a marriage and a family or are you going all in with no concern for the public eye?

In my own case, the most I have been out in public with in a given time was two wives and a fiance. Before children entered the equation.
We were +/- neutral. In that a keen observer would see but I was not walking with all of us interlinked or some such.

Looking back one it, I don't wish I had been over the top and putting on some silly show but I do regret having simply not considered a potential audience.

It sounds simple but it is a moderately complex issue depending on the family, the circumstances and the location. So I curious about other families feedback.
 
Most people won't think twice when looking at you. Most people are getting on with their lives and not even paying attention. If they see a man with two women and a bunch of kids they'll think it's a husband, wife, and her sister with various kids belonging to different people. If you're going to a pumpkin patch, it's not like you're going to be making out, you'll be busy looking at pumpkins and rounding up kids, and finding kids lost in the maze, and helping them feed animals.
And people will also make assumptions without any affection whatsoever. My husband and his sister often get mistaken for husband and wife. They go the same events together, and take their children, who look similar to each other. It's understandable people make that assumption.
I just don't see that it matters. I don't think people are paying much attention, and I think that we overthink it.
 
paterfamilias said:
First of all, you should be ashamed of your mind going in the gutter.

Now that I have the obligatory japes and hijinks out of the way, time for the serious topic.

As a guy with his mind focused on the practical aspects of plural marriage and the day to day life for polygamists, I am curious about the site's opinion about not hiding the family dynamic in public.
What I mean by this is a scenario where the family...minimum two wives obviously and let's say 2+ kids...is out in public and walking together. Let's say it is an event for the kids, say going to a family farm where they run a pumpkin patch with corn maze and animals to feed etc. Are you as a family holding off on the body language that says we are all a marriage and a family or are you going all in with no concern for the public eye?

In my own case, the most I have been out in public with in a given time was two wives and a fiance. Before children entered the equation.
We were +/- neutral. In that a keen observer would see but I was not walking with all of us interlinked or some such.

Looking back one it, I don't wish I had been over the top and putting on some silly show but I do regret having simply not considered a potential audience.

It sounds simple but it is a moderately complex issue depending on the family, the circumstances and the location. So I curious about other families feedback.
Click to expand...
If you doing wife hunting, you definitly should arrive at event with visible 2+ wives.
 
FollowingHim2 said:
Most people won't think twice when looking at you. Most people are getting on with their lives and not even paying attention. If they see a man with two women and a bunch of kids they'll think it's a husband, wife, and her sister with various kids belonging to different people.
Click to expand...
No me. I will start wondering.
 
FollowingHim2 said:
Most people won't think twice when looking at you. Most people are getting on with their lives and not even paying attention. If they see a man with two women and a bunch of kids they'll think it's a husband, wife, and her sister with various kids belonging to different people. If you're going to a pumpkin patch, it's not like you're going to be making out, you'll be busy looking at pumpkins and rounding up kids, and finding kids lost in the maze, and helping them feed animals.
And people will also make assumptions without any affection whatsoever. My husband and his sister often get mistaken for husband and wife. They go the same events together, and take their children, who look similar to each other. It's understandable people make that assumption.
I just don't see that it matters. I don't think people are paying much attention, and I think that we overthink it.
Click to expand...

^^^^

This. Well said. ;)
 
I don’t withhold or stop showing affection in public. I hold hands with both wives while in public, such as going out to eat. I do not care what someone may be thinking, but chances are, they’re not thinking about anything unusual anyways.
 
NBTX11 said:
I don’t withhold or stop showing affection in public. I hold hands with both wives while in public, such as going out to eat. I do not care what someone may be thinking, but chances are, they’re not thinking about anything unusual anyways.
Click to expand...
Hodling hands signals relationships. Others won't confuse your relationship with brother/sister one.
 
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paterfamilias said:
First of all, you should be ashamed of your mind going in the gutter.

Now that I have the obligatory japes and hijinks out of the way, time for the serious topic.

As a guy with his mind focused on the practical aspects of plural marriage and the day to day life for polygamists, I am curious about the site's opinion about not hiding the family dynamic in public.
What I mean by this is a scenario where the family...minimum two wives obviously and let's say 2+ kids...is out in public and walking together. Let's say it is an event for the kids, say going to a family farm where they run a pumpkin patch with corn maze and animals to feed etc. Are you as a family holding off on the body language that says we are all a marriage and a family or are you going all in with no concern for the public eye?

In my own case, the most I have been out in public with in a given time was two wives and a fiance. Before children entered the equation.
We were +/- neutral. In that a keen observer would see but I was not walking with all of us interlinked or some such.

Looking back one it, I don't wish I had been over the top and putting on some silly show but I do regret having simply not considered a potential audience.

It sounds simple but it is a moderately complex issue depending on the family, the circumstances and the location. So I curious about other families feedback.
Click to expand...
 
in our casewe are completely 1,000% out every one of our neighbors everyone at the church everybody we go shopping with everybody we see absolutely knows that.we are a plural family from the world we get a lot of whatever floats your boat to congratulations to good for you and we are we are mindful when we are attending churches that it might be offensive to some so we're more careful at churches hope this helps
 
MemeFan said:
If you doing wife hunting, you definitly should arrive at event with visible 2+ wives.
Click to expand...


Would prefer that pretty much everywhere I go. Ideally with another couple of kids minimum.

Prefer even more at least two women and six plus crumb crunchers
 
RonHiggins said:
in our casewe are completely 1,000% out every one of our neighbors everyone at the church everybody we go shopping with everybody we see absolutely knows that.we are a plural family from the world we get a lot of whatever floats your boat to congratulations to good for you and we are we are mindful when we are attending churches that it might be offensive to some so we're more careful at churches hope this helps
Click to expand...
How big is city where you live?

10K, 100K, 1M?
 
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