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Gentry

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This has been a struggle. Most women have "curious" feelings and seem to play and entertain the thought. For instance, we met one woman who was indeed serious but gave us ultimatums and rules that she would live by and they were not in the interest of the family network. She told us that no one would ever tell her that to do and no one could change that. I have noticed many women and I hope not to offend any-find their lives meaningful in the beginning later to then find them empty and wandering for that great hope. Not all women of course, I have seen many women with fulfilled lives and happy to serve our Lord with great content. Secular relationships of whom I am referring in this world, scoff at the idea of multiple wives in submission to one man as that man is submissive to the Lord properly.

However, the idea of fornication and adultery which destroy lives are a common and looked upon as normal. This breaks my heart, I am open to anyone's thoughts as I am only speaking from a observed opinion and would like others to let me know what they think?
 
I hear ya. Speaking as a single woman it's hard for me to even enterain the idea of meeting a married man. What am I suposed to say. I noticed you where hitting on me, are you an flandering jerk (most likely) or are you a into plural?
 
FunGirl said:
Speaking as a single woman it's hard for me to even enterain the idea of meeting a married man. What am I supposed to say. "I noticed you where hitting on me, are you a philandering jerk or are you a into plural marriage?"
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Not bad, actually. That would weed out most.

Of those few who remain, the next question might well be, "What is the theoretical, philosophical, and religious BASIS for your belief in PM?"

If he stutters about, or gives an uninspiring answer, "Yo, babe! What can I say? I'm just an incredible hunk 'o burnin' LOVE, like, ya know?" *smacking gum*, that just MIGHT cause you to toss him back.

So might the response that "The Prophet, bless his name forever, tells us in the Quran to go forth and subjugate women everywhere to the holy law of Sharia, conquering the world for Islam by keeping them barefoot, veiled, and pregnant!" :lol:

Of course, I guess both approaches DO seem to work with a certain cross section of females ... *sigh - very bewildering*

On the other hand, come hang out with this crowd at retreats. You pretty much KNOW where we stand,(... or sit,) and we fellas are just so incredibly CUTE! IGNORE the canes! We're really YOUNG at heart! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Btw, Welcome, FunGirl!
 
Cecil... Speak for yourself man! I don't have a cane... :D


I have a *cough* walking stick... for all of that hiking I do... yeah, that's it. ;)

Welcome FunGirl, I think you'll find that people here take some things seriously here but don't take themselves too seriously.

And now Cecil... about that cane thing... where can I find one?? :mrgreen:
 
Ok, now I seriously, truly don't have a cane OR a walking stick, and can't see myself needing one for many years. Unless I fall off a cliff and do myself some horrendous injury. Or unless I have a particularly disobedient wife (just kidding!). :)
 
Canes ... very useful. Concealed weapons in plain view. Sherlock Holmesian.

At a recent Friday evening, um, worship service, a member of our fine organization demonstrated in frightening detail upon his amused and willing wife (He was gentle... Sorta...) just how effective and lethal they can be.

Great misdirection, too. Who considers the elderly gentleman, slowly making his way with the help of a cane, a threat? Well, other than orientals, who just may have seen G'pa in action? :lol:

And I'm 51, but remember being in my 20s, from which perspective THIS age appeared plainly doddering!

Now as to the propoer procedure for caning wives, you must first
Cecil's system has undergone a fatal error and has involuntarily been shut down!​
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:lol: :lol: :lol:
 
No canes here, either, bub. Speak for yourself!

Did I mention that I am single?

Doc
 
I know what you mean Gentry. We've been kind of out of the dating game for a year now due to lack of potentials. The best we had was pretty dang good, but in the end backed out for worry of what her family would think\a few other minor complications. There are lots of 'curious' women out there as you put it, but they are immature (like most of our culture) and balk at the idea of having kids and a family. A fling would be so simple to get, but love\life\security that is something our culture fears. Fornication or adultery, that I could get on any given Friday night without much effort if my soul didn't restrain me. A woman to join my family and love and take care of for life, thats just plain evil in our culture, and is a pain to find even prospectives for.

Fungirl, I don't know, it would be hard to randomly meet a poly-minded man. You'd have to be actively searching to find something other than a "flandering jerk".
 
Posting is such a funny way for me to communicate; one which some are more apt then I. I am in no way looking for a poly man, or implying that I would randomly find one. I think it can happen naturally and in person rather than online like any other form of dating. Online dating would naturally add to your number of potentials. Multiple relationships are way more common then you might know, however often ungodly and highly destructive. I am "out" on my views about multiple marriage, but it doesn't come up often in conversations. My boyfriend knows, but he's a realist and doesn't see how he could fit more than 1 woman in his life. He's actually more worried about drama with the ladies then anything else, as a result of things that happened with his first wife. We were neighbors.


I think that cultural seems to be more comfortable with adultery than polygamy. Was that what you were getting at Gentry?


Example a guy from work I have a crush on hits on me but is married. I now ovoid him because the 10/1 odds are he's just a cheat or perhaps he's only a "flirty cheat" (aka no other intensions to go beyond flirting").
 
My 1st wife and I looked for a while but really only started seriously looking for almost a year before finding Angie. Once we knew there was another out there created to be apart of our family my prayers changed from "if" to "when", it was at that time I felt the confirmation we would meet her before my 33rd Birthday. At that time after praying I searched google for sister wives dating. I found this forum and a couple other sister wife dating sites. It was on one of those site we meet Angie. (2 months before my 33rd Birthday, which was 2 days ago) We met in person 3 days after meeting her online, about a week after that she was fully moved in and apart of our family. Even before we met in person both Angie and I knew we were meant to be together. Wasn't a case of her becoming my wife but more a recognition she already was in that we believe she was created to be my wife as was Mary, my wife of 11 years. Mary and I met under the same circumstances and also knew within the 1st week we were meant to be also.

Angie fits better with us then either Mary or I could have hoped. We are truly blessed to have been reconnected with her!
 
FunGirl said:
Example a guy from work I have a crush on hits on me but is married. I now ovoid him because the 10/1 odds are he's just a cheat or perhaps he's only a "flirty cheat" (aka no other intensions to go beyond flirting").
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:geek: 10/1 ????? :D MORE LIKE 100,000/1 :o
 
FollowingHim said:
And here I was thinking Steve moved fast... :D
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Yeah I suppose it was fast.. I spent a lot of time in prayer and discussion with the creator before meeting both Mary and Angie. So once we met it didn't take long at all to recognize, this person was the one I had been praying for.. They felt the same as well.
 
I actually know exactly where you are coming from there. I should have had the faith to move almost that fast with my current wife, God certainly made it clear, however I delayed for cultural and family reasons. And that delay was very difficult, painful, and ultimately a pointless waste of over a year of the wonderful life that God was trying to give me. So good on you.
 
Gentry said:
This has been a struggle. Most women have "curious" feelings and seem to play and entertain the thought. For instance, we met one woman who was indeed serious but gave us ultimatums and rules that she would live by and they were not in the interest of the family network. She told us that no one would ever tell her that to do and no one could change that. I have noticed many women and I hope not to offend any-find their lives meaningful in the beginning later to then find them empty and wandering for that great hope. Not all women of course, I have seen many women with fulfilled lives and happy to serve our Lord with great content. Secular relationships of whom I am referring in this world, scoff at the idea of multiple wives in submission to one man as that man is submissive to the Lord properly.

However, the idea of fornication and adultery which destroy lives are a common and looked upon as normal. This breaks my heart, I am open to anyone's thoughts as I am only speaking from a observed opinion and would like others to let me know what they think?
Click to expand...

I think there's too much pressure on a potential second wife. Before marriage, you could go on a casual date or flirt with a waitress, but after marriage, those things come to an end. If a certain lady catches your eye, there's this great pressure for the relationship to get serious and for her to assimilate into the family. Relationships take time to grow. And on that note, if you start talking about ultimatums and submission during the courtship phase, conflicts are invitable. It's sort of like telling a woman, "you'll gain 30 lbs, be tired and sick, suffer great pain, and then never sleep again" at the beginning of her pregnancy. It's such an insignificant thing when you look at the whole picture. Just like a preggo, a potential second wife needs to know she's not giving up her life. She will still be valued for who she is, and not for her relationship to another.

I don't mean to come across as preachy, but you have the benefit of comparing marriage to being single. You know how much your wife's changed from the time you met to present time. A single person doesn't have that knowlege. I don't think it's fair to dismiss them as "curious", I think they just don't know what they're in for.

Good luck!
 
I've chosen the prayer option myself, I have my family responsibilities to attend to now. God will send her to us when we are all ready. Then it will all feel natural, and not so much work to accomplish. When God is in control, we are free to sit back and enjoy the fruit of our labors.
 
FunGirl said:
Speaking as a single woman it's hard for me to even enterain the idea of meeting a married man. What am I suposed to say? I noticed you where hitting on me, are you a flandering jerk (most likely) or are you into plural?
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If you think he has potential, then how about this: "Have your wife talk to me about it first."

The philanderer will take it as a rebuke; the polygynist will send his wife around for a cordial chat.
 
Gre-e-e-eat answer, Mystic.
 
mystic said:
FunGirl said:
Speaking as a single woman it's hard for me to even enterain the idea of meeting a married man. What am I suposed to say? I noticed you where hitting on me, are you a flandering jerk (most likely) or are you into plural?
Click to expand...
If you think he has potential, then how about this: "Have your wife talk to me about it first."

The philanderer will take it as a rebuke; the polygynist will send his wife around for a cordial chat.
Click to expand...

If there is someone I am interested in I always introduce the wife as soon as possible for these reasons:

1. So the potential wife knows that you are about family and not looking for something secret and unholy on the side.

2. It gives the women time to work on their relationship, too, which is also important.

3. The wife can give good insight about potentials. She is less likely to be as twitterpated as you are and it is nice to get a second opinion.

4. Wives make excellent chaperones. Help to prevent you from doing anything improper, even inadvertently.
 
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