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Need Friends
- Thread starter James337
- Start date
Start with a real introduction?
Well that is one thing we have in common.
OK, so tell us more. Where did you go to school? What part of the world do you live in? What are some of your interests? etc.
Great. What would you like to talk to them about?
Like how do I
start a conversation on the subject?
@James337, I think you probably have difficulty starting a conversation on any subject. You are narrow-mindedly focussed on one single thing that you want to achieve out of a conversation, and the conversation is a means to achieve that end. The conversation is a tool.
I think you need to learn to enjoy conversation for the sake of conversation.
I don't think you need to learn how to start a conversation on polygamy with a woman. If you try, the conversation will probably end immediately.
You probably need to learn how to start a conversation of any form with a woman, how to hold a quality conversation with her, and how to end that conversation without having changed her mind about anything - except leaving her with the impression that "James is a nice man, I'd like to talk to him again".
I think you need to learn to enjoy conversation for the sake of conversation.
I don't think you need to learn how to start a conversation on polygamy with a woman. If you try, the conversation will probably end immediately.
You probably need to learn how to start a conversation of any form with a woman, how to hold a quality conversation with her, and how to end that conversation without having changed her mind about anything - except leaving her with the impression that "James is a nice man, I'd like to talk to him again".
How do?
Forget about your own goals, forget about trying to persuade her of anything. There is no purpose to the conversation. That is the purpose. To have a conversation with no purpose. You don't care where it goes. You don't care what the topic is. You don't care how long or how short it is. There is no purpose.
But if you must have a purpose - you want to listen to her talking.
You start a conversation with a woman by talking about something of complete, everyday relevance to both of you. "Excuse me, did you drop this pencil?". "Do you know where I could find the stationary shop?". "What floor are you going to?". "Can you please tell your father that I liked his sermon? I haven't managed to get a word in edgewise as he's busy talking to Mrs Jones."
Whatever she says, reply to it. It doesn't matter what you are talking about. And keep replying until the conversation naturally dies. If she looks uncomfortable / mentions she has something to do / turns away / whatever, stop the conversation immediately and leave. The conversation might stop after ten seconds, or 30 minutes. The length of the conversation is irrelevant.
If she leaves the conversation with a smile, it was a success, if she leaves looking uncomfortable it was not. That's all. There is no other purpose.
But if you must have a purpose - you want to listen to her talking.
You start a conversation with a woman by talking about something of complete, everyday relevance to both of you. "Excuse me, did you drop this pencil?". "Do you know where I could find the stationary shop?". "What floor are you going to?". "Can you please tell your father that I liked his sermon? I haven't managed to get a word in edgewise as he's busy talking to Mrs Jones."
Whatever she says, reply to it. It doesn't matter what you are talking about. And keep replying until the conversation naturally dies. If she looks uncomfortable / mentions she has something to do / turns away / whatever, stop the conversation immediately and leave. The conversation might stop after ten seconds, or 30 minutes. The length of the conversation is irrelevant.
If she leaves the conversation with a smile, it was a success, if she leaves looking uncomfortable it was not. That's all. There is no other purpose.
What part of America do you live in? What do you do for a living? What are your favorite hobbies, TV shows, volunteer activities, ministry opportunities that you have gotten involved with? What has God been showing you from His Word? Do you attend church regularly? If so, where?
How odd, you talk exactly like a James that we have already met.
What do you mean?
He means you seem very similar to another James who used to discuss things with us on this forum, and he's wondering if you're the same guy who has come back under a new username. "Welcome back", if you're him, or just "welcome" if you're new! 
YesHe means you seem very similar to another James who used to discuss things with us on this forum, and he's wondering if you're the same guy who has come back under a new username. "Welcome back", if you're him, or just "welcome" if you're new!
If it’s you, welcome back!
If not, welcome!
@James337 This was directed at you. Tell us more about yourself.