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Marriage doesn't have to be....

Maddog

Maddog

Member
Male
Hello, from what I have read, I find that marriage in the Old Testament closely resembles a purchase-and-sale agreement. Dear Old dad gets a couple sheep and young man gets a woman. I find that all the swearing in locks a man into an agreement that he really doesn't understand but his libido gets him in trouble... again. Do women really go for the idea that she is OWNED by the dude? Some do, mine does but what about the rest of western civilization? Ladies, what is YOUR value to the patriarch wannabe- 3 three sheep or perhaps more?
 
Maddog said:
Hello, from what I have read, I find that marriage in the Old Testament closely resembles a purchase-and-sale agreement. Dear Old dad gets a couple sheep and young man gets a woman. I find that all the swearing in locks a man into an agreement that he really doesn't understand but his libido gets him in trouble... again. Do women really go for the idea that she is OWNED by the dude? Some do, mine does but what about the rest of western civilization? Ladies, what is YOUR value to the patriarch wannabe- 3 three sheep or perhaps more?
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This practice arose in Israel's neighboring cultures, so Israel copied it, it was not a creation of God. I don't believe it is necessary..
 
Maddog said:
Do women really go for the idea that she is OWNED by the dude?
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Personal experience, one is very relieved to be owned while the other one isn’t, to put it mildly.
 
steve said:
Personal experience, one is very relieved to be owned while the other one isn’t, to put it mildly.
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I think it's nice that you give each there space! My one and only don't really want to be owned,so I give her lots of space! If you asked her she might say she is submissive.A good Cowboy likes spunky horses!
 
Rocky said:
I think it's nice that you give each there space! My one and only don't really want to be owned,so I give her lots of space! If you asked her she might say she is submissive.A good Cowboy likes spunky horses!
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Did I give her the space, or did she take it? 😉

Spunky is good, but taken too far………not so much.
 
Maddog said:
Do women really go for the idea that she is OWNED by the dude?
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I feel very safe and comforted, knowing that I am owned and will always be taken care of. I don't have to worry about everything, I just do as my husband asks. I trust my husband will take care of me and I trust God will give my husband the ability to do so. I feel so much less stressed now that I am married and owned by my husband. 😊
 
Yan said:
This practice arose in Israel's neighboring cultures, so Israel copied it, it was not a creation of God. I don't believe it is necessary..
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Some might think how can Rocky like your post and Meganc's post there contradictions! They are not if you Taylor it to the individual woman! What turns on one woman might not turn on another! There's a lot more to this, and I only speak from what I read,cause I only have one wife,I do know a little about erotic arousal though,and before I get into trouble I only bring that up because MeganC said she finds it sexy.Dr Marriane Brandon has wrote extensively on the subject. One E book she wrote is titled bringing back the sexy in surrender! Well I'll just sit back and wait from my discipline from the brethren now!!!!!
 
Rocky said:
Well I'll just sit back and wait from my discipline from the brethren now!!!!!
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Only thing I’d say is:

Dude, some congregation must have done a number on you. Almost every post seems like there’s a whipped cur attitude. Buck up! We’re not monsters here. Most of the men are pretty hard nosed and straight talking but not arses.

Don’t assume you’re going to get dogpiled with every post you make. The people here have been extremely loving and kind to everyone I’ve seen. It’s only the divisive and angry jerks that get called out for being an idiot.

This is a great community. Let yourself relax and be at peace.
 
Hmm. Owned isn't a word I would choose. My hubby asked me to marry him and I said yes. My dad approved so asking him for my hand/his blessing was just a formality....not a purchase or sale kind of thing.

I really like very much belonging.....with him....to him. I also really like being a first wife. I don't say that because it makes me more in any way then his second, but because I think she is a very wonderful woman.

Rocky said:
Some might think how can Rocky like your post and Meganc's post there contradictions! They are not if you Taylor it to the individual woman! What turns on one woman might not turn on another!
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I can only speak for myself. I have heard some women are put off by by their husband taking another wife....and some find their man more desirable when someone else loves/wants him too. I can't really explain the why, but sexy is when your hubby has the love and devotion of two women....and loves you both!

Happiness is having a loving family.

Overflowing happiness is when you can be that for his new wife too. :-)

Lots of blessings.
 
I am speaking for only myself. There is a great comfort in ownership. I feel less stress because I don't have to worry so much. My testimony includes raising my children with no help from their father. When I say no help, I mean zero anything. So going from being forced to handle everything to being owned, yes owned, by my husband is a relief.
 
Joleneakamama said:
....and some find their man more desirable when someone else loves/wants him too.
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This is basic hypergamy. Women are attracted to men that other women also find attractive. That's all part of red pill attraction dynamics.

Joleneakamama said:
I can't really explain the why, but sexy is when your hubby has the love and devotion of two women....and loves you.
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This is a basic female need. She wants to feel secure in her husband's love. It is wonderful that you have it.

Sadly, this need for a feeling of security is also one of the reasons women wrongly oppose polygyny, feeling that the husband will abandon her for the other woman. Women need to understand that men (especially godly ones) don't work that way.
 
Maddog said:
Hello, from what I have read, I find that marriage in the Old Testament closely resembles a purchase-and-sale agreement. Dear Old dad gets a couple sheep and young man gets a woman. I find that all the swearing in locks a man into an agreement that he really doesn't understand but his libido gets him in trouble... again. Do women really go for the idea that she is OWNED by the dude? Some do, mine does but what about the rest of western civilization? Ladies, what is YOUR value to the patriarch wannabe- 3 three sheep or perhaps more?
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So what do you think the bride price would translate to in today's market?
 
Hisdaughter said:
So what do you think the bride price would translate to in today's market?
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Very crudely, a shekel is about half an ounce, or 10 Roman denarii (pennies). A denarius was a days wage for a labourer. So 50 shekels would be 500 days wages for a minimum wage employee.

On the other hand, as silver is much cheaper today than ever before in history, 50 shekels or 25 oz of silver is only a few hundred dollars. That is misleading. But if you follow the letter and pay in silver it's currently a low price.
 
Bartato said:
Sadly, this need for a feeling of security is also one of the reasons women wrongly oppose polygyny, feeling that the husband will abandon her for the other woman. Women need to understand that men (especially godly ones) don't work that way.
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I would love to emphasize WRONGLY (but my text modifying buttons don't work) because it is the monogamy only social construct that is so contrary to real committed marriages/families.

I am danged certain Roman's 1:26 is just talking about un natural relations because the women lacked security in a world that had easy divorce and enforced monogamy.
Too many women in this world get traded in after many years.

Seeing how backward it is has always made me outspoken on this subject. I doubt it really changes much the way other people feel and think. But maybe seeing it work will.

Our sweet daughter in law had a hard time with even the theoretical idea. But when I told her it looked like this gal was my kind of crazy she teared up, and told me she had been praying for us all. She can see we are all happy....and she is happy for us.

We have a few in our close circle that will still treat us "normal." Kind of remains to be seen who else will be able to adjust.
 
FollowingHim said:
Very crudely, a shekel is about half an ounce, or 10 Roman denarii (pennies). A denarius was a days wage for a labourer. So 50 shekels would be 500 days wages for a minimum wage employee.

On the other hand, as silver is much cheaper today than ever before in history, 50 shekels or 25 oz of silver is only a few hundred dollars. That is misleading. But if you follow the letter and pay in silver it's currently a low price.
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Putting that further in perspective, the temple tax was a half-shekel per man, which on that crude working would be about 5 days minimum-wage wages. Per year. If only modern taxes were so low!

And back to bride-prices, what I suppose I'm saying is that a bride price was somewhere between $800 and $80,000 in todays money, depending on how you do the maths. I'm not sure if that is quite the level of precision you were looking for in an answer @Hisdaughter. :)
 
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