Male to Female versus Husband to Female ratios.

[Shadowjak's Dancer]

I have been contemplating how often the male to female ratios have been discussed. It occurs to me, however, that this isn't the only pertinent question.

I have a fair number of backyard animals. This has led me to contemplate the dynamics of animal husbandry. On the one hand, some people take that concept a little too far. In the other, it got me contemplating the notion of husbandry in general and how that pertains to the marital relationships in our society.

It occurs to me that the ratio difference grows considerably when one only considers males who would qualify as being good shepherds, as such.

After all, there are a number of so-called shepherds out there that abandon their flocks to the world. There are downright predators masquerading as shepherds, going around fleecing and consuming the sheep that have been left without a proper shepherd, and there are males that simply have zero interest in being a shepherd. There are other categories, to be sure, but in the end, creating a simple ratio between available males and available females seems to oversimplify when it should rather be a ratio between them that need a good shepherd and good shepherds.

 

[steve]

I have long said that every female has the right to be married, but a male should have to earn the right.

A woman may have to adjust somewhat to make the relationship work, but a male cannot adjust to being a good leader if he hasn't the capacity/proclivity.

 

[Verifyveritas76]

Like your post Steve, but I'm just sayin, I've known some gals that would stress that 'right' to the breaking point or at least make a fellow say, Well, maybe she has the right to get married . . . but . . . not it!

 

[steve]

But my point is that a woman can choose to accept leadership, granted that it would be harder for some, but they could keep making that choice.

For some guys, choosing to be a good leader would be like choosing to be six inches taller. It ain't happening, they have not the ability.

 

[steve]

Stated another way, a woman with selfish tendencies can be helped to moderate by a good husband if she CHOOSES to submit to his guidance.

A husband with selfish tendencies is going to be a nightmare because he does not have anyone to guide him besides his wife.
Yeah, that's such a good plan.
A leader being led by those who he is leading.

 

[Shadowjak's Dancer]

Precisely. Like not everyone is fit to be President of the USA. (Not a comment on anyone in particular, as I am REALLY hoping this doesn't ignite an offshoot debate about current affairs)

Simply put: we need leaders in society. Naturally, those who are capable of leading groups of others have to be exceptionally skilled to do so in a way that others aren't, or choose not to be.

One of the qualities of leaders in Israel: "Men who are able". Not just "Men". They must be able, fearing God, and hating covetousness. Not all men are able. Let alone adding fearing God AND hating covetousness on top of being able. Suddenly, the pool of qualified individuals narrows considerably.

 

[andrew]

Stated another way, a woman with selfish tendencies can be helped to moderate by a good husband if she CHOOSES to submit to his guidance.

A husband with selfish tendencies is going to be a nightmare because he does not have anyone to guide him besides his wife.
Yeah, that's such a good plan.
A leader being led by those who he is leading.

Well, that's eventually going to circle back around to the whole discussion about eldership/leadership in the assembly, but without that oversight I agree with you 100%. In fact, most of the men in the institutional churches (in my experience) have been conditioned to believe that their highest calling as men is to keep their wives happy ("happy wife, happy life", right?), so they end up taking direction from their wives, albeit in an indirect way, often while proclaiming that the man is the head of the house....

 

[steve]

The eldership help is great for some of the assistance that would be needed, but on day to day issues, I don't see that it would be a good answer if the guy needs that much help.

In the Old Testament times, no father would give his daughter to someone who didn't qualify.
That is where poly would come in, ''tis better to choose a good man for her to be second or third wife to, than first wife to a guy that had, say, a drinking problem.

 

[andrew]

In the Old Testament times, no father would give his daughter to someone who didn't qualify.
That is where poly would come in, ''tis better to choose a good man for her to be second or third wife to, than first wife to a guy that had, say, a drinking problem.

Smart. Preventative or pre-emptive intervention instead of trying to fix it somehow after the knot has been tied.

 

[Mojo]

Some leaders are born naturally, but I do believe it can be cultivated. Our society is spending all its energy cultivating it in women

 

[andrew]

Our society is spending all its energy cultivating it in women

Touché!