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Let's have some fun with "In the Beginning it was not so..."

S

Shadowjak's Dancer

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Going over the same Christian argument points. In my mind, even if we were to accept a polemic against some, but not all, divorce as being reasonably extended to a template for marriage which can be used in argumentation not merely against the horror of tearing that union asunder, but even to show how marriage must go down in the first place... I should like to know which of the circumstances should be included in the paradigm, thus below are imaginings on how theological debate could proceed:

In the beginning it was not so, for God caused Adam to marry his closest next of kin.

In the beginning it was not so, for God caused Adam to wait until he was unconscious, and extracted his genetic material to give back to him as a wife. (Therefore, we should only marry clones of ourselves which modern science could probably make happen)

In the beginning it was not so. For God, being Adam's Father, essentially caused Adam to marry his sister in that family structure.

In the beginning it was not so, because Adam awoke from being passed out and found a naked woman by his side. (Admittedly, most men find themselves in this position only after a night of heavy drinking, but that then must be the key to unlocking Divine providence) [Perhaps Lot's daughters understood this theological stance]

In the beginning it was not so, for God caused Adam to marry his first biological offshoot.

In the beginning it was not so, for God only introduces spouses to one another as they walk naked in gardens.

Any one care to add?
 
Or one could say that these are all allegories for a higher spiritual purpose.
 
jacobhaivri said:
In the beginning it was not so, for God only introduces spouses to one another as they walk naked in gardens.
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So, let me see if I got this right, there’s this nudist camp out there where we are supposed to go to find our spouses? And it’s called “The Gardens”? Hmmm, makes ya think.

Bringing this thread back out of the rabbit hole I just created, the idea of this thread is thought provoking. What would all the things mentioned above really like? And what would life be like if we were still doing things ‘as in the beginning’?
 
jacobhaivri said:
Going over the same Christian argument points. In my mind, even if we were to accept a polemic against some, but not all, divorce as being reasonably extended to a template for marriage which can be used in argumentation not merely against the horror of tearing that union asunder, but even to show how marriage must go down in the first place..
Click to expand...

I'm honestly not sure what this all means.

jacobhaivri said:
In the beginning it was not so, because Adam awoke from being passed out and found a naked woman by his side. (Admittedly, most men find themselves in this position only after a night of heavy drinking, but that then must be the key to unlocking Divine providence) [Perhaps Lot's daughters understood this theological stance]
Click to expand...

So if I pray to God in faith for a second wife, should I expect to wake up to find her laying naked next to me?

[don't you go getting no ideas @Foxlily]
 
All this really does is make the literal, plain reading of scripture less understandable without the full context of the matter.

Which means there could be a deeper meaning to any level of understanding we may have at any given time.
 
Wanted: vegan girl for a monogamous relationship who loves the outdoors, is into natural living, not caught up about the latest clothing fashions, into kinky role playing, and likes animals.
 
rockfox said:
So if I pray to God in faith for a second wife, should I expect to wake up to find her laying naked next to me?
Click to expand...
It worked for Boaz, well..... ok, she wasn’t naked.
But he seemed happy anyway. :D
 
Two examples! Why, that's practically a Biblical model. Oh wait, there's a third: 1 Kings 1:1-4

Thankfully that one means I don't HAVE to marry her if I'm not entirely pleased with what I see.
 
rockfox said:
Two examples! Why, that's practically a Biblical model. Oh wait, there's a third: 1 Kings 1:1-4

Thankfully that one means I don't HAVE to marry her if I'm not entirely pleased with what I see.
Click to expand...

I actually think that one is meant for old guys.
 
rockfox said:
Young guys, middle aged guys, old guys...God will answer all your prayers to receive a woman in the night.
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So I have been frustrating the will of YHWH by turning away all of these women knocking on my truck door in the middle of the night?

Dadgum, who knew?
 
No, no, not a woman OF the night. Unless you're prophet of God that is.

I first wrote 'receive a woman overnight'. But that sounded even worse. 'while you sleep' is what I meant. But not just while you sleep, as in, that's when she'll show up. Maybe that's where David messed up.
 
“While You Were Sleeping”?
 
Let that be a lesson men, be careful what you ask for because you just might get it.
 
So I'm confused, are we suppose to pray for a woman to show up while we sleep. And are we suppose to get our wives blessings?
 
rockfox said:
Wanted: vegan girl for a monogamous relationship who loves the outdoors, is into natural living, not caught up about the latest clothing fashions, into kinky role playing, and likes animals.
Click to expand...

That's where Adam messed up, he should have prayed for a carnivore.
 
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