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Finances in the case of second wife not working out

Lilac

New Member
Female
Hello friends,
This would get a better response on the general chat but I’m too shy to post there. Maybe some of you have heard about this already.
In Australia if a woman and man live as husband and wife in the same home for 6 months they are legally considered defacto spouse and if they separate, they can attempt to claim half of the spouses assets/financials. I imagine America has something like this also.
Obviously as the first and legal wife, the law would be clear on that situation in the case of divorce. I have heard of women who marry and after not too long they divorces and take far more than is fair. But what about a second wife (not legal of course)?
My husband and I have worked hard to achieve what we have achieved and I’m wondering how to protect those assets in the case of a second wife not working out and claiming the right to take away what she did not contribute to.
Do polygynous men you know of have some kind of pre-nups in place or some experience with things going sour with second/thirds in the financial realm post separating?
I tried to post anonymously in the main chat but it seems like I can’t do that.
 
Our family has a trust and an LLC. Each person's share is very well defined. And everyone's share is legally protected.

Not giving you legal advice here but I would recommend speaking to a qualified attorney if you want to go this direction.
 
Would your husband be open to you sharing how this is setup? I’m curious how the shares would be allocated for a new wife compared to an existing wife/wives of 10/20/30 years.
Our family has a trust and an LLC. Each person's share is very well defined. And everyone's share is legally protected.

Not giving you legal advice here but I would recommend speaking to a qualified attorney if you want to go this direction.
 
I've attempted to have a similar discussion here in the past, and it dang near started a war. As far as I'm aware, second wives do not have any claim to the legal marital funds. It's completely understandable of you and your husband wanting to protect what you've accumulated, but this is also an important topic for women joining a family because we have absolutely no financial protection, no matter how much we contribute to the marriage. This is something that has deeply concerned me in the past when considering joining a family, and it's not talked about enough from either perspective.
 
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I've attempted to have a similar discussion here in the past, and it dang near started a war. As far as I'm aware, second wives do not have any claim to the legal marital funds. It's completely understandable of you and your husband wanting to protect what you've accumulated, but this is also an important topic for women joining a family because we have absolutely no financial protection, no matter how much we contribute to the marriage. This is something that has deeply concerned me in the past when considering joining a family, and it's not talked about enough from either perspective.

This is tricky subject because it is such a household to household thing. It is contingent on so many factors that advise is hard to give. What works for one man's "wealth" will not necessarily work for another man's "wealth." @theleastofthese this should definitely be at the top of your ask list for new families. Some might have already thought about it and others might not have even taken the time to think about it. You should definitely think about what seems "fair" to you, and what kind of protections you can put in place for your "wealth" whatever that might be. Communication regarding it should bring common understanding, and the good thing is that most financial plans can be changed as things change over the years.
 
This is tricky subject because it is such a household to household thing. It is contingent on so many factors that advise is hard to give. What works for one man's "wealth" will not necessarily work for another man's "wealth." @theleastofthese this should definitely be at the top of your ask list for new families. Some might have already thought about it and others might not have even taken the time to think about it. You should definitely think about what seems "fair" to you, and what kind of protections you can put in place for your "wealth" whatever that might be. Communication regarding it should bring common understanding, and the good thing is that most financial plans can be changed as things change over the years.

I very much agree. Especially if you're dealing with the difference between rural families and urban/suburban families.

I say that because with the rural families part of their relative wealth will show up in the form of home grown foods and home raised meats. Meaning that the cash earnings for the rural family can be lower but their lifestyle and diet can be better than that of the higher earning (but also higher spending) urban/suburban people.

Urban/suburban people pay a premium for access to the quality of food rural people often take for granted.
 
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