Re: Does God 'call' a husband AND first wife to plural marri
For all the what ifs and scenarios that could be comprehended, I maintain that the only "call" is to seek God. As a husband to a wife seeking God in unity, we have not had any differences regarding our hearts or thoughts towards having a plural family or any of the ladies we have met. It's a joyful testimony that we are united as we are through God.
I believe that after a second wife joins the family, any potential for more would require the same unity, but with more people. Therefore, it would not be a non-issue. All the more consideration should be given.
A wife is a help mate given by God. To refuse her assistance is to refuse that gift. As for your headship vs her emotions, I posit that both could be edifying and glorifying God, just as easily as both could be missing the mark. My wife was absolutely excited at the possibility the first time we spoke to one another about it. God had been working on each of us individually in preparation, just as the polygynous husband is expected to operate individually with each of his wives. While you may not have found a scripture detailing the mind of a woman about to become a first wife, you will find many other scriptures regarding the way we are to be in relationship with our wives and cherish them. From those, I understand how I am to treat her.
Changing another person's mind, heart, or belief is impossible for us. No man could change mine, and I can not change my wife's. We can seek God, and in doing so more opportunity is given to those around us to be reminded of His glory. They may then choose for themselves. God created us to not be forced to love or believe, to work against that is futile.
From my experience in other areas, I believe that proceeding despite an existing wife's wishes would be a vex to her. Therefore, I wouldn't. Also, consider that polygyny is not the model, but a possibility. For some, attempting to find the "true meaning" to plural marriage must be like me trying to find the "true meaning" of celibacy. It may be acknowledged and academically understood while remaining a mystery in regards to experience... and that's fine by me.
For all the what ifs and scenarios that could be comprehended, I maintain that the only "call" is to seek God. As a husband to a wife seeking God in unity, we have not had any differences regarding our hearts or thoughts towards having a plural family or any of the ladies we have met. It's a joyful testimony that we are united as we are through God.
I believe that after a second wife joins the family, any potential for more would require the same unity, but with more people. Therefore, it would not be a non-issue. All the more consideration should be given.
A wife is a help mate given by God. To refuse her assistance is to refuse that gift. As for your headship vs her emotions, I posit that both could be edifying and glorifying God, just as easily as both could be missing the mark. My wife was absolutely excited at the possibility the first time we spoke to one another about it. God had been working on each of us individually in preparation, just as the polygynous husband is expected to operate individually with each of his wives. While you may not have found a scripture detailing the mind of a woman about to become a first wife, you will find many other scriptures regarding the way we are to be in relationship with our wives and cherish them. From those, I understand how I am to treat her.
Changing another person's mind, heart, or belief is impossible for us. No man could change mine, and I can not change my wife's. We can seek God, and in doing so more opportunity is given to those around us to be reminded of His glory. They may then choose for themselves. God created us to not be forced to love or believe, to work against that is futile.
From my experience in other areas, I believe that proceeding despite an existing wife's wishes would be a vex to her. Therefore, I wouldn't. Also, consider that polygyny is not the model, but a possibility. For some, attempting to find the "true meaning" to plural marriage must be like me trying to find the "true meaning" of celibacy. It may be acknowledged and academically understood while remaining a mystery in regards to experience... and that's fine by me.