My wife and I trained for adoption in Arizona, so I can only tell you about state relevant information, and it will probably vary depending on the state. Here there are organizations that will help you go through the procedure, and will actually pay for the legal fees if it comes to that stage.
We had a number of people adopting their grandkids, or other in the family situations. It seems like they would rather the children remain in their birth family, if possible, as a matter of policy. I would suggest finding out what your local agencies are.
If you want to talk further, send me a private message, and I would be happy to talk it over further.